The Taken-For-Granted Syndrome

By Anokhi.

Almost everybody on the Earth has this syndrome except children. They are just too innocent to understand what this even means. You must have used this statement ‘I have been taken for granted’ or ‘You have taken me for granted’ many a times in your life and every time you used it, you either had tears in your eyes or anger in your heart. So what exactly does this ‘Taken for Granted’ mean? Let’s relate ourselves to one of these short stories :

1.The Sibling Story

Arjun and Anaahita were siblings. Arjun was two years elder to Anaahita and both studied in the same college. While Arjun was allowed to hang out till late in the evenings, Anaahita had to take a 1 pm bus back home everyday as 2 pm was her deadline. She was not allowed to go for parties, on picnics, or for shopping with her friends. But in the case of Arjun, the rules were different. He would usually reach home late in the evenings. Sometimes, Anaahita didn’t like the way she was being treated. But then, there was no one to listen to her.

It was the day when Arjun had planned out a party with his friends and Anaahita came to know about it from her friend. Arjun had not informed his parents about it. When Anaahita confronted him, Arjun shouted at her and told her to mind her own business. This made Anaahita desolate.

The next day Arjun came to know that Anaahita had not informed their parents about it. Arjun was relieved. His late night-outs started increasing as he knew that there was nobody who would complain about him to anyone. One day, Arjun came home completely sloshed from the party. Anaahita couldn’t take it anymore and went to talk to Arjun. Arjun started abusing her leaving her completely shocked.

Anaahita said,” Stop this right now Bhaiya (brother). Just because I have never complained  about you, you have taken me for granted. I think, now, it is high time that I informed Mom and Dad about it”. Thus, because of that incident, where the brother’s words were filled with anger and the sister’s eyes were filled with tears, the siblings drifted apart.

2.The Couple Story

Pooja and Deep were husband and wife, working in the same field. It was when Pooja delivered a baby, she had to give up her job so that she could give all her time and love to the baby and take care of her. As she was an ambitious woman, she always missed her job. When her daughter was three years old, she asked Deep if she could start working again. Deep refused and told her to wait for a couple of years. Pooja always kept herself busy in the daily chores at home and hardly went out much to meet her friends. When her daughter was four and ready for school, Pooja told Deep that she wanted to get back to work as Ruhi had grown up. Deep refused, telling her that she was a lady and it was her duty to look after the house and their daughter.

Days passed. Pooja couldn’t take the depression of not being able to work anymore. She wrote a letter to her husband and kept it on the dresser. When Deep came back home after work, he couldn’t find Pooja and Ruhi. He noticed Pooja’s note and started reading it.

“Dear Deep,

I always wanted to go hand in hand with you and wanted to help you build a house of our own. I left my job just to take care of our child and wanted to get back to it to help you in providing for our child’s future. You never tried to understand me. I always accepted what you asked me to do. You took me for granted. I am going back to my Mom’s house and taking Ruhi along with me. I do not know if I can get back to stay with a man who doesn’t understand me.’

Deep broke down because Pooja had left the house in anger. Their bond was broken beyond repair.

3.The Friendship Story

Naina and Riya were very good friends since childhood. They loved doing stuff together. They went for movies, for parties, for shopping and did all what the girls of their age usually do. But their personalities were a bit different. Naina was an introvert, a shy girl always in her comfort zone and Riya was completely an outgoing and adventurous girl who loved to make new friends. Naina used to get a complex while talking to guys, while Riya had a lot of friends who were guys. Being in the same college, Naina always used to read in the library whenever she was free and Riya would spend time in the canteen with her other friends. It was on that one day when Naina saw this guy in the library who was looking for a particular book. Coincidentally, it was the same book that she was reading. When the librarian told the guy that Naina had it, he went to her and said,” Hi.I am Rahul. Can I please borrow the book which you are reading? I need it urgently for a project which I must submit tomorrow.” Naina just handed him the book and left.

The next day, Riya asked Naina to come with her to the canteen as there was no one else to keep her company. While the two were talking to each other, Rahul came and greeted them. Riya shook hands with him and Naina just nodded her head. Rahul then asked Riya,” Is your friend always like that?” and Riya giggled in reply. Rahul was Riya’s best friend. Riya had a soft corner for Rahul and Rahul liked Naina’s reserved nature. He tried to be friends with Naina but she didn’t let him advance, but after a few days, Naina accepted his friendship. Riya was not liking the attention that Rahul gave Naina. Slowly, friendship turned into jealousy. Riya stopped talking to Naina and Naina couldn’t understand what was wrong with her, until one day when Riya told her the truth that she loved Rahul since a long time. Naina then promised that she wouldn’t come in between, as for her, Riya was much more important than Rahul. Naina stopped talking to Rahul. Rahul couldn’t understand what was wrong and asked Riya the reason behind Naina’s silence. The hide and seek game between Naina and Rahul kept going on for long. Then one day Rahul came to know the actual reason of Naina’s silence which hurt him badly. Rahul went up to Riya and told her, “Riya, you have always been a good friend of mine and I will always remember you as one, but I wanted to tell you that I have loved Naina since the day I saw her in the library. Her simplicity attracted me and for me, it was love at first sight. You had taken Naina for granted as she always did what you wanted and the thought of me loving her made you jealous. I am sorry Riya, but I can never be yours.”

Riya was devastated on hearing the bitter truth. That day, the distances between the three had grown to intolerable heights. Riya lost two of her best friends.

What do these short stories tell us? Do people really understand the pain someone goes through when they are taken for granted? Life is about loving the other, regardless of the relationship they are in. It is about understanding each other equally. When someone loves you, do not use them for your own good because what you would be left with, is nothing.

  ‘Exchange your negative thoughts with positive ones before your positive mind turns into a negative one!’


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